As July comes to a close, we’ve done our fourth and final transfer of the embryos that were retrieved last October. We got 15 eggs, of which 11 fertilized. Of those 11, 9 were still going strong on day 5, which meant a fresh transfer of two, and freezing seven. Over the course of the last 7 months, we’ve transferred all seven frozen embryos, usually in pairs, except this last time. We only had three left, so we decided to transfer them all, that way if it failed, we could move on to another fresh cycle with embryo testing.

When I first spoke with my doctor about this cycle, he asked how many we’d like to transfer, knowing that we had three left. I told him both David and I would like them all to be transferred, based on our history of non-success. My doctor luckily agreed on one condition, which I agreed to.

This time around, I decided that my pre transfer beverage of choice would be iced tea. Tea always has the ability to fill my bladder a LOT, so I thought it would be good to drink as I usually have problems with the amount the recommend to drink not being enough to fill my bladder to where they’d like. So 32 ounces of tea later, and the first scan shows I’m completely empty. Great. Two more bottle of water later, and I’m still darn near empty. Even more great. I was threatened with a catheter to fill my bladder for me, but luckily the cath into my uterus went just fine, so I was spared the “joy” of having my bladder filled with liquid from the wrong direction.

I had made a playlist of meaningful songs to listen to, and timed it just right to get the one I wanted for transfer to play right when my doctor was ready to do it. Here are a few of the very meaningful lyrics:

“I’m not surprised, not everything lasts, I’ve had my heart broken so many times I stopped keepin’ track”

“I tried so very hard not to lose it”

“And I know someday that it’ll all turn out”

“And I promise you kid, that I’ll give so much more than I get, I just haven’t met you yet”

“I might have to wait, I’ll never give up, I guess it’s half timing, and the other half’s luck, wherever you are, whenever it’s right, you come out of nowhere and into my life”

“And I know that we can be so amazing, and baby your love is gonna change me, and now I can see every possibility”

Here’s me in my post transfer Valium induced calm, still listening to my playlist, trying not to get too emotional.

Here are the two pictures they gave us, one of the embryos shortly before transfer, hatching out of their shells nicely, and the other of where they were placed in my uterus.

My mom came up again (thanks mom, you’re the best!) for my 48 hour bed rest sentence. It puts my mind at ease knowing that I don’t have to worry about anything but resting while she’s here.

I go back in later this week for a hormone check to see if my medications need to be adjusted and then in less than two weeks we’ll find out if this cycle has worked. Prayers and good thoughts are always welcome during this precarious time of will-it-won’t-it!

The past 3 months have really been a test of my patience and of managing what I expect from my infertility clinic and doctor.

We began the drug portion of this FET cycle two-ish weeks ago. The first week was an easy one, with just one injection a day. Last week I began the pill popping, which has been much better this time around. I don’t feel nearly as many side effects as I did every other time. I think the big difference is that I’ve switched from generic estrogen to name brand. I think that the switch has also helped with the reason I have to take estrogen. For example, last cycle it took 3 weeks and 4 days from when I started injections to when I was able to do the transfer. This time around, it will once again be 3 weeks and 4 days, but my uterine lining is going to be much thicker (thicker=better) by the time we get there, and with less medication total.

I still plan to share what is going on, but I’m going to be a bit more vague with dates this time around. Based on my appointment this morning, I should have my final transfer before July ends. That means that during the first two weeks of August I will have at least one beta, hopefully more than one!

We are still planning to thaw and transfer our three remaining embryos, with the hopes that one or two of them take. I will once again be doing intramuscular progesterone, which means more injections. I know this may sound crazy to some, but I am looking forward to the pain, and hoping that I have it for several months.

 

Ah yes, managing expectations. The title of this post. I almost forgot! Both David and I were ready to start again as soon as possible after the D&C, but that was over 3 months ago. I didn’t think we’d be forced to wait this long, as many fertile people can get pregnant just a few weeks after a D&C. I’ve been pushing my doctor to shorten everything, because I know there is no medical reason to wait around this long to do another transfer. It has been horribly frustrating. And after I saw the numbers on the ultrasound this morning, I thought for sure they would schedule the transfer for 5 or 6 days from now, which turns out to not even be close. I was super disappointed when my nurse gave me the potential transfer date as it was way further away than I was hoping for. After thinking about it for a while, I’ve come to accept that they are just working on a preplanned schedule, and there was/is nothing I can do to make it go any faster (also frustrating as heck!).

 

Third times the charm, right?!